Thursday, 11 July 2013

What Do The Sexes Have To Offer - Exactly?

Somewhere in a Manosphere comment I read someone saying that women are only good for sex, and otherwise bring nothing to the party. Harsh much, but I get how the guy has a point.

I'm a well-organised man, who preps and cooks his own food, keeps his quarters clean, washes, irons, cleans dishes and paans, has a reasonably-stocked fridge and shelves, gets the bills paid on time, gets the car taxed and MoT'ed, and generally deals with all that life maintenance shit. The introduction of a woman into my life is a net drain of resources: I have to fit her in round the housework, the gym and the job. That's about an hour a day in the week and ten hours at the weekend. Seriously. (I have an hour commute and wake up at 05:45 to be at work for 08:00. Weekend days start with a visit to the gym. The commute is productive: reading or writing.) So what does she bring? Or rather, what does she bring that a guy doesn't? Maybe feminine charm, but ladies, half of that lies in the possibility of sex. Once there's definitely no sex, you lose your privileges and are just another guy. It's kinda obvious really. 

It's just as true for a well-organised girl with a day job and a gym habit. Life is determined by logistics and economics first, then by biology and culture. And what does a man bring to her party? These days almost as little. And if she's not fucking him, he's just another eunuch to her. That's right guys, she's looking at you and not seeing sexual possibility at all. Not sure I like that idea. 

As ever, there's a clue in the question, or at least, the implicit premise of the question. What can a woman bring to a man leading a well-ordered, organised life? What many men value in women is exactly the random they create - for a lot of people, that random, from women, from children, is what living is about. Not, however, if you're an organised bachelor. For guys like me, random is a liability, and that leaves the girls with sex, or they're just guys with curves.

Which is where I'm guessing our guy is coming from. It comes across as harsh because of the implicit dismissal of the other things women can bring. Like… ummm. Oh yes, Soul mates. And companions. And sympathy. And support. And help with the travails of life. And children.

Yeah. Right. This is not to say that some women can't be some of those things to some men - though it is to accept that many women cannot be any of those things to nearly all men. It is to say that in the world I live in, the tempo of life means that if people aren't armouring up to go to work, or armoured up at work, they are frustrated, stale and tired in the three hours between getting home and going to sleep. Five days a week they have nothing left for each other. As for the weekends, don't get me started on the misery and anger given off by all those married-with-young-children couples-in-Carluccio's-and-Pizza Express. I stopped going into weekend shopping centres to avoid those awful vibes. Good Anglo worker drones, and even twerps like me, have very little left to give by way of time and emotional energy after the job and the household and life maintenance have drained it all away.

So, yes, our guy is being harsh, but it's true. In the Anglo world right now, there's very little for men and women to give each other that they can't get with a good flatmate. Except sex.

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