Friday, 27 January 2012

The Proust Questionnaire

1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
 Blue sky, clear air, sunshine, beaches, sea, never having to worry about money or organising anything

2. What is your greatest fear?
 That my body goes on living longer than I can afford.

3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
 Low energy levels and crippling self-doubt.

4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?
 When they eat smelly food on trains.

5. Which living person do you most admire?
 Terence Tao.

6. What is your greatest extravagance?
 I don't have enough money to be extravagant.

7. What is your current state of mind?
 Tired. Always.

8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
 Whose list of virtues did you have in mind?

9. On what occasion do you lie?
 If I don't trust you.

10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
 The bit where I don't look like me.

11. Which living person do you most despise?
  Anyone who thinks they can leave their morals behind when they swipe in at work.

12. What is the quality you most like in a man?
 I don't really "like" men.

13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?
 That they are polite enough to flirt with me.

14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
 'I think'

15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
 I don't do oxytocin

16. When and where were you happiest?
  You're making an assumption there...

17. Which talent would you most like to have?
 Energy and lack of doubt

18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
 More energy, no self-doubt

19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
 For a couple of years, I was possibly the best in the world at the job I did. Maybe only a couple of hundred people in the world did it, but that's enough. 

20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
 Oh shit. I have to do this again?

21. Where would you most like to live? 
 See 1.

22. What is your most treasured possession?
 My health. When it's around.

23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
 Drunk self-pity.

24. What is your favorite occupation?
 Wait. I can do things I like doing? When did that become an option?

25. What is your most marked characteristic?
 I don't drink, drug or use mood-altering chemicals.

26. What do you most value in your friends?
 That they're still here.

27. Who are your favorite writers?
 I steal from them all.

28. Who is your hero of fiction?
Philip Marlowe

29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?

30. Who are your heroes in real life?
 Socrates, Paul Feyerabend, Craig Murray and Groucho Marx

31. What are your favorite names?
 Girls' names that sound like thick black hair and luscious lips: Julia, Rachel, Sarah

32. What is it that you most dislike?
 All the seats being taken already.

33. What is your greatest regret?
 All the women I never made love to.

34. How would you like to die?
 Quickly, and soon after I next lose my day job.

35. What is your motto?
 One day at a time.

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