Getting Laid For Free, Ain't Free

The Rule is: if it flies, floats or fucks, rent, don't buy. The reason is that buying planes, boats and wives (weddings) is expensive, all three have high maintenance and running costs, and unless you're very lucky, you can lose a lot of money on disposal.

What counts as "renting"? Any arrangement where the man is not responsible for the expenses and debts of the woman. Co-signed the mortgage? You've bought. Had a child together? You've bought. Married? Guess what? Sharing a flat and bed together? Grey area: if she's working and expects to pay her share of rent, you're still renting her. Given her a key to your place, let her move in some clothes and receive official mail there? Dodgy. Try not to do that.

Renting runs from one-night stands to paying escorts to living-together-without-contracts. In London, good-quality escorts go out for £250+ an hour. That's the benchmark. Pay more than that per lay and you need to re-examine your choices - unless you're very rich and are paying for very high quality, as you can in this town.

In London or a big city, Night Game costs drinks, nightclub entry and taxi fare, just to play. That's pretty much at least £60 - £100 a shot. The Notch / Night rate may be better, but even at 20% that's still around £400 a notch.

Day Game is a whole other thing. If you do it systematically, it's financially horrible. The hidden cost here is that Krauser's spare time is not free: he's an IT contractor in Financial Services and those guys make upwards of £400 a day. He could be earning six figures annually, but chooses not to. It's a rare contractor who works all twelve months a year: let's assume he could work six months a year. If I've followed his year right, he's done a three month earning stint in 2013. In nine months he gets thirty lays, so in six he gets twenty. The extra ten notches are the benefit of his chosen lifestyle. The extra ten notches cost around £25,000 in lost post-tax income. That's £2,500 a notch. Yikes! And those notches are almost all one-time: all those girls who are "on their last night in London"?

So one-night stands make no economic sense in a Big City, unless you are doing a job that exposes you to a large number of women whose social control is lowered and to whom you have tempting status or looks.

Relationships spread that Notch acquisition cost over a number of Lays, but add maintenance and running costs. As long as that running cost stays below £250 / week, you're ahead. The hidden cost comes from the fact that very few people go straight from one MTR to another. There might be six sexless months between each one. While an MTR is running, it's an economically-sound source of sex, but when it's not, we're back with escorts, Night Game or chastity. So to the acquisition and running costs of an MTR, you have to add the cost of sex between the one that's just finished and the next one. Cheaper, but no Aldi.

Looking at the cost of sex isn't considered polite. Men don't really want to admit that sex costs them money, and women don't want to admit that the sex they provide has an identifiable cost to the man. It's all too close to prostitution.

So here's the trick everyone pulls on themselves. They tell themselves they are not going to the club or the bar to get laid: they are going for the booze, the music and the event, and if they get laid, that's a bonus. Same with any other method or venue for pick-up. I'm going to go for a walk in St James' Park - if I happen across a pleasing young lady there, that's a bonus. If I don't, I've still had a nice walk. Go out looking to get laid and anyone will come back disappointed: so let's pretend we're not. That way, one night stands are always free, just like they were back in university.