Downtown

Is a classic 1965 song by Tony Hatch sung by Petula Clark. Baby Spice – I'm sorry, Emma Bunton - did a version in 2006. (That's over forty years later: those songs were a darn sight stronger than we all thought at the time. Quick: name a song written in 1925 that was in the charts in 1965. No? Thought so.) It's about how you will shake off the blues so much better if you go to the heart of the Big City – even when I first heard it, I assumed it was about Manhattan, not London – and seek out entertainment there. One reason it's strong is that it has an six-line verse, a five-line verse and a chorus. The third three-line verse is:

And you may find somebody kind to help and understand you
Someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand to
Guide them along...
So, maybe I'll see you there
We can forget all our troubles, forget all our cares and go

Okay. Now, who is Petula singing as and to whom? Sometimes girls sing boys' songs just because that's how it worked out in the A&R meeting. Well, she must be singing as a woman to a man – right? In which case, she's waiting for you downtown, and in 1965 there weren't that many professional women drowning their sorrows after work. Of course, she could be a professional with an older profession.

The key words are: “Someone who is just like you”. Just like you (a boy) how? She's a girl in 1965 and back then girls weren't like men like they are now, in 1965 women were different. And if she was a girl meeting your boy, why would you need a "gentle hand to guide [you] along"? You're a boy, she's a girl, and back then boys and girls who were out late knew what they were out late for. It was a damn sight less coy than it became later. But if you're a boy and she's not a girl, but a boy, and it's 1965, well, then everyone needs a gentle hand to, err, guide them along.

Damn. Another great song that's actually about the gay life. Listen to it on You Tube anyway.